After my last post I've been thinking about grief and grieving it is a very sad time when someone close to you dies as they are no longer physically here for us to cuddle, see and to communicate with us. Our emotions are numbed at the time and we don't know how we are supposed to feel, it was a new thing to me when I lost my son (Phillip) and it was the most painful time of my life as if my heart and soul had been ripped out and a big gaping hole remained at the time and for a long time after all I wanted to do was to join Phillip in heaven and thought of ways to do it.. I knew I would never go though with suicide as I couldn't put my own Mum or Dad through the pain I was feeling at that time I also had a husband and 2 other babies that needed me and I could never abandon my own obligations to their well being so they became my focus and I ran on auto pilot for so long looking after everyone else. I'm not one to go to others for help so a counsellor wasn't for me although I think the Police did offer us one. If a child dies a Police officer has to put in a report of the events leading up to the death in Australia, my husband and dad had to make a statement about the accident I luckily didn't have to as I don't know if I could of coped with that as well, we have a copy of that report and the coroners report in amongst the sympathy cards I'm not sure I read them or want to.. The counsellor wasn't for me but if you read this and are currently grieving and having suicidal thoughts go and seek help as some times you just can't pull through on your own.. I eventually pulled myself out but my own heart/soul has only just recently reopened after I shared my story (we still don't talk about it within my family as it is a hard subject to broach or discuss as it does bring back those same painful emotions) I also wanted to share my discovery of Angels and how they are with us daily and can help if you ask and if have an open mind to receiving messages from them to help guide us where we need to be and to pull us out in those tough stressful dark times if we find ourselves in them. ** I just wanted to add I had suicidal thoughts as I wanted to join my son so much but I didn't have depression.. So if you feel you just can't go on if you have lost someone like the man that lost his mum in my last post please go and seek medical help to help pull you through the dark times and ask your own guardian Angels to help you with this also. You are worth it and things will get better..**
If you read my other posts what I also found helpful with the grieving process was to find out exactly where Phillip went and that he was being looked after and he was safe in God's hands until I could be with him again.. I did read John Edwards 1st book 'One Last Time' and 'Transformed by the light' Dr Melvin Morse a book on near death experiences, from them I learnt that when our body dies our spirit and soul still remains and death is just a continuation of our souls journey and we meet up with our loved ones when it is our turn to join them in heaven. We are still connected through our souls love for each other we can still get messages to them and from them if we learn what they are.. When you talk to your loved ones as if they are still here they do listen and they may communicate back by a familiar song you listened to, a certain smell, a visit in your dreams, butterflies, rainbows or anytime you feel that they are near trust your feelings as they most probably are near and still watching over you. When we pass over to the other side all pain, feelings of hate, spite, pity, revenge and any negative energies disappear all that is left is love and feelings of peace..
God and the Angels will help you carry the burden of the loss of your
loved one and there will be joy again the light is at the end of the tunnel
just never give up on your own life as the pain will subside the best
advice I got was "Take it one day at a time"..
I still do take one day at a time and try not to plan to far ahead
I just let things happen naturally as they are meant to.
I always choose to have love in my heart and language.
I have taken to Alicia keys and her lyrics so here is another
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